Friends and faithful,

Inspired by two of my Seven Istanbulian brothers, I've decided to take up this journaling bit, and share with you all some of the thoughts that pass through my mind, which I find rather interesting. Whether you'll find them interesting, I can't say, but I hope that you do. However, regardless, I hope I can learn from you all as a result of this. I speak to the tune of J.Z. and M.V. when I say that I hope to sound not pretentious, but inquisitive.

By the way, you should all check out an excellent piece on cheese at http://micvee.blogspot.com/.

I was eating a spicy bagel and cream cheese the other day at a small cafe across the street from where I work. Perhaps it was the jalapeño that brought my mind around to sin. But where, thought I, is the battle for eternity? Where do we line up forces to defend against a foe and attempt to stay righteous? Is it our souls? On such an infinite plane, it would seem likely that we often align on different fields, sometimes we win the field but lose the day, because we miss the battle. Perhaps this is why we all fall short and sin.

Why was Lucifer Cast out of heaven? What temptation was Jesus resisting in the wilderness? What did Peter say which earned him the rebuke "get thee behind me Satan"?

Is it sinful to desire food or water after fasting for 40 days and 40 nights in a desert? Was it sinful for Peter to plead with his Lord and friend to spare his own life? If that is so, why was it not sinful for God to demand Abraham's first son as a sacrifice? And why do I think it would have been sinful to refuse such sacrifice?

What I think all of these have in common is that whatever was sinful, was sinful because it had the effect of separating us from God's will, and putting our desires and decisions over God's. It is no less a sin against ourselves than it is against God.

In Lewis' sci-fi trilogy, title Peralandra, the Mother and Father of Peralandra are forbidden to sleep on a certain fixed land, they must spend all of their nights on floating islands, without a very satisfactory explanation. But the purpose for the forbiding, for the law, was so that one day they would come to find a different fixed land, that had been prepared for them by Oyarsa. Perhaps the real evil in sin is the separation it causes us from God's love, not the act itself. The act itself is sinful only because it achieves that goal.

What then of victory over this weapon? I can take heart because Abraham did not become Father of a nation in a day. It took a lifetime of lessons in faith. And if Abraham, who was righteous because of his faith, took a lifetime to develop it, then I don't think we would be expected to accomplish that in a day either. Even when Abraham entered Egypt, he didn't have enough faith to be honest about his wife! It took Abraham a lifetime of learning to trust in God for him to be able to hear and see and know when it was that he was putting his interests before God's, and to be able to line up on the right field of battle.

Why is faith so important to victory, to becoming closer to God? When we have faith, when we begin this walk, when we begin to hear God's voice over our own screaming desires, and we make choices pleasing to him even when they are not pleasing to us, we are safer and happier than we ever would have been. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego are a great lesson:

"....if you do not worship it, you will be thrown immediately into a blazing furnace. Then what god will be able to rescue you from my hand?" "O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, ad he will rescue us from your hand, O king. But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up." Daniel 3:15-18.

Faced with certain death, these faithful men were able to hear God's will because they knew God's heart. They stepped out in to the unknown because they knew that is where thier God was, they put him before thier own desire to live. And they put themselves in good hands. " the furnace was so hot that hte flames fo the fire killed the soldiers who took up Shadrach, Meshach, and Abendnego....then King Neb...leaped to his feet in amazement and asked his advisers, 'weren't there three men that we tied up and threw into the fire?....Look, I see four men walking around...unbound and unharmed...."

But for victory we don't have to wait that long. We have a savior who took away any weapon that the enemy had to separate us from our Father. Now, if we fall short, if we miss the battle, we do not lose the day, we do not lose the feild, we cannot be separated from the Love of God any longer. The gap was closed, and every time we fall, we simply need whisper the name of our Saviour, and galloping he comes to lift us back up. Next time you feel like you've lost, like you've fallen, slid, whatever it is you feel, if it is as a defeat to you, say out loud, "Father, I love you!" At that second, you've won and the enemy has lost, because you stood back up, You are no farther from our Father than when you began, and are in fact, now closer. Not only do you not lose, but you are victorious, and the enemy is defeated.